Breast Cancer and Me - by David Wrigley

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David at The London Fashion Show October 4th 2006

Breast Cancer and Me

Not knowing Men could get breast cancer is bad enough, but when I was told that I had it – what a shock.

I had found a lump in the right side of my chest – men are not know as having breasts – while on holiday, thought nothing of if, put it down to being fatty tissue – something I have had over the years.
This was July / August 2003 and we were busy at work so it was October before I had the opportunity to visit the doctor – I had a lot of pressure from my wife Sheila and daughter Gemma saying I should get it checked out. My own GP was on holiday so I was seen by a locum – he checked it out and said “don’t think it is anything to worry about, but I will refer you to the hospital for them to have a look, if you haven’t heard anything in two weeks, give the surgery a ring”.
Two weeks passed and I had heard nothing – rang the surgery, they two had heard nothing, but would check things out and call me back. This they did and I had an appointment in early December at the hospital – some 9 or 10 weeks after going to the GP’s surgery.
Went to the hospital – saw the specialist – saying I had a lump in my right chest in the breast area – he looked and said “if you were a woman and had developed breasts – this lump would be no where near – but we will check it out just to make sure”.
Everything from this point went into warp speed – I had an Ultrasound and a Mammogram within a week – sent for a core biopsy – within days – reappointed at the clinic by Friday December 19th.
I turned up at the clinic for my appointment – the only other men were supporting there female partner – Sheila had asked if she should come with me but, I said no I will go on my own as I thought it was something and nothing.
I was called to the room – with funny looks from the others you could see them thinking “why is he going there this is a Breast Clinic” – I sat down opposite the consultant chatted a little – noticed more and more people coming into the room through the corner of my eye, when all had arrived – the consultant started to run through the checks they had done on me – we had the Ultrasound and the Mammogram then the Biopsy confirmed that you have Breast Cancer.
I had never heard of breast cancer affecting men – this was a woman’s problem and said so. I was told it was rare but I was the third man they had diagnosed with breast cancer in the last 12 months.
The consultant carried on telling me what was going to happen – but I heard nothing I was still coming to terms that I had Cancer – how do you tell the loved ones this? Not knowing how long you have left – I had only known 2 people who had had cancer – both died in a very short time.

This was just before Christmas – I was to have surgery on the 5th January 2004 – this would involve a complete Mastectomy to my right side – I would loose all breast tissue – lymph nodes would be taken – depending on the tumour not sure what else. This would be followed by Chemotherapy and Radiotherapy. I was also told that I was very young at 52 to have BC, it is usually and older persons problem.
I was taken to another room by a person who became my breast care nurse – she gave me leaflets to take home to read and if I had any problems I should contact her. I was then told I could go.

I left the hospital, returned to my car and just sat there not knowing how could I tell Sheila and my two children Andrew and Gemma – I had Cancer. I sat in the car some 10 minutes before I telephoned Sheila – she asked how I got on – she was horrified when I gave her my news – I arranged to go to work and take the rest of the day off – so we could discuss things at home. I told Andrew and Gemma – we all met back at home.
We decided as a family we would fight this thing all the way – we would take one day at a time – we didn’t really know how many days we had, at this time. We would have to make the best of Christmas – we knew it would be the same for all of us – I was the one who had the Cancer – but family members go through everything too.
I read the leaflets given to me at the hospital – the leaflets contained information about Breast Cancer – they were all aimed at Women – there was just one little paragraph the mentioned men could get breast cancer too. They were no good to me I did mention this to my nurse – she apologized for the content – said there was not a lot out there for men.

I had my operation on January 5th 2004 at 4pm – everything went fine – Sheila came to see me at 6pm – couldn’t believe how well things had gone – I was not in any pain what so every.
I was offered pain killers by the nurses – I asked what can I have – they said anything from Morphine to Paracetemol depending how bad the pain was – I said thank you I require nothing.
I was seen by the doctors every day – I was given the news on the Wednesday that all had gone well, I did shed a tear or two after. I will admit – they had removed breast tissue, 16 lymph nodes and half of my pectoral muscle – when I saw the wound, I thought they had placed a zip on my chest, never seen so many staples, middle of my chest and disappeared under my right arm -but they had got it all.

The results
Invasive 3cm tumour – Grade 3 ER negative – Pectoral muscle half removed due to tumour affect.
16 nodes removed none infected.

Day 3 after the operation – I had a visit from a physiotherapist who gave me stretching exercises to do – I must admit I was very surprised how much I could achieve (and to be honest she was too) – yes it hurt, but “no pain no gain”, a motto well worth following.

I don’t think there are any differences between men and women with breast cancer – but there is a difference in the way both are treated.
All the literature regarding breast cancer is written for women – there is a screening program in place for women (over 50).
I got very annoyed with the literature I was given to read regarding what to do while in hospital after a mastectomy.
It you feel uncomfortable after your mastectomy – try a sleep bra – this may help.
If you are feeling a little depressed while in hospital – put on a little make up or your favourite perfume.
This I could not comprehend and switched myself off. I mentioned this to my BC nurse – she said well you know what to do then, write your own – so I did.

While recovering at home – I spent a lot of time on the internet, looking for information regarding Men and Breast Cancer, I checked all the UK sites they only had little info – the best were the American sites – they had a lot more for men.
I made this my goal – I would look at how I could help to get information on web sites so that any man who was diagnosed in the future would not be ignorant to the fact that Men get Breast Cancer too.
I was told about the charity Breast Cancer Care and spent a lot of time on the forums. I was asking questions, seeking information from anyone – some women on the site treated me as a weird – saying how could I be interested in Breast Cancer not being female.
The charity ran a Peer support option where anyone who had BC could join the organisation to help others – I thought this is for me – requested the information, filled in all the forms – only to be told that I would have to wait 2 years before I could be come a volunteer.
I really needed to speak with another man who had had breast cancer – so I could find out how they had dealt with things. But men are few and do not come forward too often. Some are even embarrassed to say they had Breast Cancer. It is never mentioned. Through the peer support system I did eventually speak to a anther man – he was in Scotland.

It was now time to start my Chemotherapy I was to have 6 treatments – it was decided that it would be in my best interest to have 3 then I would have 25 sessions of Radiotherapy followed by the remaining 3 Chemo.

I remember turning up for my first session and the nurse asking for my views of Chemotherapy – I said “I don’t have any views yet, as I have never had it before – but I will tell you later”
Chemotherapy affects people differently - so there is no need for me to go into detail – I will say I did have bad times – but overall got through it well.

In the Chemo room – I did find out that not all are treated the same – I found out that women are on drug trials – out of the 10 or 12 people in the room, all were on different treatments – some where only having chemo – some were having chemo before they had surgery – when they asked me about my diagnosis – I told them I wasn’t given any option, I was told what would happen and when – I thought this was normal.
This was when I found out that Men and Women are treated different.

Women are offered trials – they are offered reconstruction or a prosthesis – they can have there clothes altered to make them look as if the have breasts.
I was not offered anything until some 18 months after surgery and only then when I asked.
I was even told by some women that it is not as traumatic for a man – I can assure you it is – we go through the same thing – but not offered half the extras.

Look at the figures
41000 women diagnosed with BC every year – some 1300 die of the decease.
300 men diagnosed out of the 300 – about 70 die.
The percentages are very different.

I had breast cancer – it was removed from my body – I have been treated both with Radiotherapy & Chemotherapy – will be on Tamoxifen for a few years – I have nights sweats and mood swings – I am now an ex smoker – but I still wake up in the morning – life goes on – I have accepted that I have had breast cancer and will be a cancer patient for the rest of my life – but I will fight for the right to live, for as long as I can.

Nobody knows how it affects other people – I as a cancer patient knew how I was feeling, but how do you tell others?
You look so well – if I didn’t know you had, had an operation; I wouldn’t believe you had cancer – yes I get tired too. These are all things that have been said to me over the last few months.
I do feel well – but my family and I have to hell and back – I feel we are not all the way back yet – we may never get there either.
No one tells you how cancer affects your personal life – no one tells you that it will take a strong marriage to get through everything.
I would like to finish off by saying – there is a lot more help now for men with breast cancer – people are more aware now that Men along with Women get BC and all the main cancer web sites now have more information.
There are interesting places on the internet which can be used to access information on BC – there are forums and chat rooms – where people can discuss their concerns and these in turn can be a great place to pass the time when you are getting over your operation – or when you can’t sleep – or when you need a friend.
I myself found the forums most helpful, through my treatment – I still go on there now and again – just to see what is happening in the BC world.

The men in the forums have, along with the staff at Breast Cancer Care, put together a booklet aimed at men who are diagnosed with BC in the future. It gives the views of not only the medical side, but that of the few who have gone through the cancer thing and are still around to help others.
The Booklet was launched at the Breast Cancer Conference in London June 2005.

I am now and active part of Breast Cancer Care – I have become a volunteer and Peer support worker I make myself available to talk to groups or individuals about Breast Cancer – I will help others Male or Female get through the trauma of being diagnosed with BC.
I have appeared on local BBC television, BBC radio, several local newspapers and this year, October 2006; I will be appearing in the Breast Cancer Care Fashion show in London.
www.breastcancercare.org.uk

The London Fashion Show October 4th 2006

Well I took part – what an event it was – there were 2 shows, afternoon and evening – to

David Wrigley

MENews Moving Forward with Mens health in Calderdale

MeNews moving forward with men’s health in Calderdale
ISSUE 4
November 2006
Men really do get breast cancer
Inside This Issue
1 Men & breast cancer
1 David at Breast Cancer Care fashion show in London
2 MHW evaluation
3 Health of Men conference
3 Football & alcohol don’t mix
4 Men’s health week 2007
4 Upcoming events
David, a local man, was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2003. His family persuaded him to go to see his GP after he developed a lump on the right side of his chest. He was then referred to the local hospital for investigation of his breast lump. After having a mammogram, an ultrasound and a biopsy he was given the news that he had breast cancer.
Surgery to remove the lump, breast tissue, 16 lymph nodes and half the pectoral muscle followed quickly. He then had a course of chemotherapy and radiotherapy and a two-year course of Tamoxifen. David has now finished his treatment.
It was during chemotherapy that David noticed how men and women with breast cancer were treated differently. Women were given treatment options, the chance to take part in drug trials and offered reconstruction or prostheses. Also the written information was geared towards women. This prompted David to look on the Internet for information and found the American sites very useful. He eventually got in touch with a man in Scotland who had had breast cancer and found it beneficial to talk to someone who understood what he was going through.
David has taken part in putting together a booklet about men and breast cancer and is now a volunteer for Breast Cancer Care and a Peer Support Worker. David has appeared on BBC television, BBC local radio and in local newspapers in his attempts to publicise the fact that men can get breast cancer. During Breast Cancer Awareness Month David took part in the Breast Cancer Care Fashion Show in London.
If you would like to talk to David about men and breast cancer or you think it would be useful for him to come to speak at a meeting you can contact him through Janet, Tony or Theresa.
We have got copies of the booklet that David was involved in producing in the Resource Centre, if you would like a copy please contact Janet or Tony.
David noticed how men and women with breast cancer were treated differently.

Staff:
Manager Tony Burgin
Support Worker Janet Klievens
To contact us:
Theresa (Hx 281529) or Tony (Hx 397340) or email on:
theresa.greenwood@calderdale-pct.nhs.uk
tony.burgin@calderdale-pct.nhs.uk